Stylised Monologue

Friday, 12 August 2011


Ok, so, lets put it out there, snakes have a bad rep. They bite, they scare, they wrap around you and squeeze you to death, they are cold blooded, they have weird tongues that humans occasionally imitate, they are just NOT the cuddliest of pets. "Oh I've had enough of my day, I just want to go home, eat ice cream, watch a chick flick and cuddle with my cobra" is, for a reason, not a phrase attached to dishevelled and possibly menstrual women around the world and as much as I try avoiding cliches in my writing, I will acknowledge that they have some truth in them, hence why the above phrase has never caught on. However, as evil and hated as they might be, you can't deny that they are fierce dressers. Snakes are the Kate Moss of the cold blooded world, the Valentino of serpents and unlike their only real competitors in the animal kingdom, the leopard, the snake is a reptile after our own heart and will never be happy enough owning just one garment (hello!shedding of the skin).  

Now, PETA fanatics across the world (ridiculous little story: Anthony at some point convinced me that PETA stands for Pets Emerging Triumphant Again HAHAHAHA I can't believe I fell for it, so stupid!) before you get your buckets of red paint ready to throw at me, let me tell you a)I look nice in red b)I'll never tell you where I live so you'll just walk around London aimlessly c)I don't really do real fur/leather/snakeskin so you really needn't worry. 
 There is a variety of reasons why I love snakeskin so much.Let me showcase a few
 a)It looks awesome
 b) it has the power to turn you into a rock star
 c) it could, trigger interesting Adam and Eve/ religious/ comeonweallreallycomefrommonkeys conversations 
  d) It goes with all types of jewellery
( the simple silver ring, is not actually a ring at all haha! The plumber came over and worked some magic on our broken tap and this is just something he took out of the tap and was going to throw out (yes, my technical plumbing knowledge is nonexistent) )
  e) it inspires all sorts of dramatic posing

 f) and it's not too bad for jumping either (you know me by now, anything that stops me from jumping would be banned!)

trousers: ASOS
top: River Island
Rings: topshop and from my tap (look above for explanation haha!) 
shoes: ASOS 


  1. Love this post!
    So funny. Adam and Eve picture is hilarious.
    And the trousers are to die for. Have to get me a pair. xx

  2. Thank you so so much! I really appreciate your comment

  3. Hey , thanks for your comment on our blog! Loveeee your pants, just followed you on Bloglovin!!!

    xoxox Teresa

  4. Really cool pants! And love those booties!

  5. Hey, I follow now your amazing blog!! Hope you follow me back...:)
    Mela xx

  6. great post! and this blog is awesome and beautiful...
    love it!

  7. love the pants!

    xo Ashleigh

  8. wow i adore your pants !! wish they would be mine...