Stylised Monologue

Wednesday, 17 October 2012

Excuses, excuses...

Ok so what are the chances that we can pretend my 4month long absence never happened?


but guys, I was working hard at a little shinding in London. You may have heard of it... The Olympics, it was called!

Before you stand up on your tiptoes in uproar about my potential #humblebrag (I'm hashtagging because that's what all the cool kids do nowadays, get with the times!), let me explain why I'm telling you this. I am telling you because a)it was a surreal experience and b)the scedule was hectic, SO HECTIC THAT I COULDN'T EVEN SLEEP LET ALONE BLOG! I honestly don't think I actually slept for MONTHS. It was like a really long day with short naps in between. As well as lack of time, on my list of excuses is the absolute inexistence of style that comes with working nonstop! Not that I had a choice, those smexy beige trousers and super flattering green top (can you hear the irony through the italics?) were ALL I was allowed to wear, thanks boss!

and as far as accessorizing goes, this gorgeous photo was the only thing adorning my neck... what a beaut,right! How did this accreditation only earn me a half arsed stalker and zero modelling contracts, I will never know.

Working at the Olympics was brilliant. There's so much to say that I feel I should write a whole separate article for that experience. Here's a couple of things that happened: we worked so hard that our brains started finding 'kick me' post-its hilarious. The temporary enviroment led to situations like my boss challenging me to say the word 'naughty' to as many IBC guests as possible on the last day. At one point I had the (self-proclaimed) 'richest man in Dubai' who was also their 1st ever gold medallist and a member of their royal family, wait in our office for half an hour, drinking flat fanta out of a plastic cup whilst his PA was flapping about on the verge of a nervous breakdown because he was meant to be on TV in, like, 10 mins but as their channel had not given us the correct info we were unable to let him through. I also pretended I didn't know what Rob Kardashians name was because I'm THAT cool.
And we had an awesome quote wall (probably had to be there for most of these to be funny? or just maybe skip sleep for a few months and read these again then.)

Ahhh it was great.

And then I went to Greece in September. [Greece which is still a perfectly beautiful and safe country btw, contrary to what a shocking amount of ill-informed people believe here in Britain. ] 
I had been looking forward to it more than words can say. Chilling in a hammock, eating grapes (yes, it was essentially a Dionysian orgy in my imagination!) and not having to work ALL.THE.TIME.

So the day finally arrived! I peeled the beige/pine green/hideous uniform off of my skin, partied until 6 in the morning like it was the end of the Olympics, packed my suitcase, went to the airport, bid the world goodbye every time the plane went through any type of slight turbulance and finally, I landed in 35 degrees about to start my summer while everyone I knew was turning off the lights to theirs.

And I didn't work, and I slept, and I sat in the hammock and I ate grapes. And it was the biggest shock to my body/brain EVER. Chilling was stressful and static and I just wasn't coping!

(everyone say hiiii to Irma, she's 17 and the best dog ever. -hiiiii Irma. )

This is my best not coping pose... I think it transfers the sentiment pretty well, no?

Never in my life had I thought that being on holiday would take so much effort. Thankfully, after sleeping for about 3 days straight, I managed to relax a little and go to the beach and swim and eat sea urchins and pose on like a knob.

Like what am I even doing in this picture? yoga whilst holding on to my hat? err anyway.

I have a lot of pictures and funny stories to share from my next couple of weeks on holiday, when I finally managed to unwind my wound up brain and set off to visit amazing places like Ydra and Nafplio. But for now, I have to go back to article writing because, you know, a lot of things have happened on those catwalks since I got back and I gotsa cover them. I WILL get back to this blogging malarky however! PROMISE, PINKY PROMISE!!!

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